There is to be a natural tension between the mother and the father. This not a conflict, only the tension of balance.
It is the duty of the father to prepare the child for the world. The father must equip the child for all of the ugliness and filth of the world. Dark places are the realm of the father, existing in the child’s mind first as a protector from whatever exists in the shadows, later as a torch to illuminate the night.
Therefore the father trains and hardens the child. He is a teacher. To be correct the father must reveal the corporeal world to the child in digestible nuggets, providing time for wounds to heal and confidence to build.
Unlike the father who is to challenge, the mother must protect. For as long as possible she must provide safe haven, a shelter that the child will be ever confident of.
This sanctuary is an intangible creation, but it is real nonetheless. The child will know it to be true. It thus falls to the mother to be the spiritual instructor, for through her love the child learns faith, hope, and charity. The essential teaching of the mother is an understanding that the child is never wholly alone. The mother teaches temporal love.
It is the father who shows the world as it is and prepares the child to survive. The mother shows the world as it should be and prepares the child to create it.